It’s Never “Private”

Our EMR has a function where we can view the patients arrving inthe ED viewing chief complaint, time arrived, length of stay and the doc and nurse assigned.  Usually we view the board to look for possible admits, giving us the chance to make adjustments to staffing and sometimes rooming assignments inorder to be able to absorb a possible admission to the floor.  Call it thinking ahead.  We can see our frequent flyers arrive and which doc is on (Dr. Milion Dollar work-up then Admit or other docs).

Sometimes though, it is a source for entertainment.  I love seeing why people come to the ED.  It never ceases to amaze me why people decide at 3am to show up.  I’ve seen the usuals, abdominal pain, chest pain, nausea/vomiting/diarrhea, fever, back pain, suicidal/homicidal ideation.  Every now and then there are the ones you go, “WTF?’  Like sunburn, sick and spells.  But I saw a new one not too long ago that really piqued my interest.  All it said was, “Private.”

We were not so busy at the time that one popped up so our imaginations ran wild.  As you could assume the ribald variey was the most common. What most of us figured was that it was a stuck object or something similar.  We never did find out but it sure gave us a couple of laughs!

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