New Ways to Classify Urine

Clear.

Yellow.

Frothy.

Red-tinged.

All so boring.  So trite and normal.  There has got to be a better, more descriptive way to classify it.  Hmmm…

How about beer?  Stay with me here.

Cloudy, amber with a slightly frothy head.  Could be a nice IPA or a patient with high bilirubin.  Am I right?  I live in a town that prides itself on its beer.  Hell, we call it “Beervana” and has the most breweries per capita.  We can call it the Portland Urine Scale, or “the P.U.S.”

You have:

Pilsner.  Clear, yellow.

Blonde Ale.  Cloudy.

Lager.  Concentrated, still clear.

IPA.  Amber, hazy.

Stout.  WTF?!

It’s not a perfect system, but it makes giving report more fun.  “Yeah, I’d say it was like a light IPA, not too amber, hazy and it smelled strong.”  Engaging, creative and descriptive, what a great way to share information?

 

Advertisements

3 Comments

  1. Ok, OK. I had to provide a urine sample for a preemployment drug screening, and having drank copious amount of water beforehand, mine was “Sprite-like clear”. :))

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s